It’s interesting that we have two ears and one mouth. Shouldn’t we spend more time listening than talking? If not time, then learning to listen. In our fast-paced world, true listening sometimes takes second place to all sorts of distractions. Yet, it is the second strongest communicator, only surpassed by touch. The act of listening may be the most profound way to connect with others and build a genuine connection with them. How can we truly listen so people feel heard? First, listening is more than just hearing words. It involves being fully present in the moment, setting aside your thoughts, judgments, and internal monologue. Quiet your mind and give the speaker your undivided attention. Listen to what is being said and what isn’t being said. Too many times, we start to formulate our response to part of what we heard instead of focusing on the whole message. Avoid interrupting or planning your response while they are speaking. It’s okay to pause before following through with your thoughts and words. Next, embrace active listening. Reflect back on what you’ve heard or capsulate the gist of what you heard and ask for validation. with phrases like, “It sounds [reframe and repeat what you heard]…” or “So, if I heard you say…, did I get that right?” This helps confirm your understanding and shows the person that you value their words. Avoid interrupting or planning your response while they are speaking. Instead, allow pauses to digest their message. Remember what I said above? “Listening also means tuning in to what isn’t said.” Non-verbal cues, like body language, facial expressions, and tone, reveal a lot about the speaker’s emotions and thoughts. You can respond with more empathy and compassion by picking up on these subtleties. Finally, practice patience. Genuine listening requires time and intention. When you try to listen with focus, you gain insight into others and build stronger, more trusting relationships! Remember, being heard is a fundamental human desire, and offering your attentive ear is a gift that fosters connection and understanding.
